Keep Asking & You Shall Receive: The Art of Negotiations
- Allison McGill (SWiB)
- Oct 3, 2015
- 2 min read
One of the first SWIB events I attended last year featured a talk with Joan Kuhl, CEO and Founder of Why Millennials Matter, as a part of the “Simon Women Who Inspire” campaign. Why Millennials Matter is an organization that focuses on raising awareness to employers about investing in the future workforce (millennials) and provides employers with insights on what is important to the younger generation in terms of personal and professional development. During the event, Joan provided a fascinating perspective about the importance of personal branding and sponsorship (not mentorship) for women. I was completely enthralled and simultaneously overwhelmed by the information provided. I wanted to figure out what my unique value was and what I could contribute to my future employer.
At some point in the discussion, the conversation shifted to value/ worth and compensation. So, I boldly raised my hand and asked Joan if she could provide us with tips for successful salary negotiations or resources on negotiation strategies. She responded by recommending a few books by Linda Babcock: “Women Don’t Ask” and “Ask for It: How women can use the power of negotiation to get what they really want”. At that moment, I made a commitment to read one of those books this past summer, and so I started reading “Ask for It” in July.
Now, two months later, I am proud to say that I have finished the book! Overall, I was impressed by the thorough and effective strategies Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever provided in the book and their emphasis on using negotiation in daily life for practice. The authors even go so far to recommend that women negotiate for the price of gas! That may be a little extreme but the purpose of doing this is to: 1) get more comfortable with asking for things; and 2) get more comfortable with rejection (i.e. hearing “no”). Yet, one thing I do wish that the authors discussed was how these negotiation strategies differ for women of various racial and socio-economic groups. Do these same approaches apply given that I am a woman of color? Does the job function or nature of the job matter here?
While my initial intention for reading the book was to develop a strategy for salary negotiations (this will definitely be important for me as I search for jobs this year!), I found that I could use the negotiation tips for almost anything I want from my boss, my co-workers, my friends, and even my significant other. It’s not about what you ask for; it’s about how you approach the situation. If you approach it with a more collaborative, problem-solving, “we’re all in this together” mentality, then you have a better chance of getting what you want. With that said, I encourage all you women (of all backgrounds) to just ask for it because you might be surprised with your results, but remember: “if you never hear no, you aren’t asking enough”.
Good Luck!
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